Commencing

More from St. Paul-Minneapolis: University of St. Thomas student commencement speaker makes waves:

Commencement offered the chance to put all the divisive issues aside. As is the custom, the student-selected Tommie of the Year speaks at graduation.

"The speech started out pretty normal," Aus said. Then, he said, Kessler began talking about his disappointment at fellow students after a spring dance when a food fight became intense enough that security was summoned.

"His disappointment kind of snowballed," Aus said.

Kessler also alluded to the unmarried professors caught up in the travel policy battles, calling them selfish. And he then called women who use birth control selfish.

He also called himself selfish and said he needed to be a better person, said university spokesman Doug Hennes.

Some defended his remarks, while others said he had no business raising hot topics on a day dedicated to students and families celebrating years of hard academic work.

Aus and other students were upset that St. Thomas officials didn't stop the speech.

"If someone were to start talking about their beliefs on gay rights, I guarantee you someone from the administration would have put an end to it right away," Aus said.

The university president's statement:

regret that the graduates and their families and guests were offended by Mr. Kessler's remarks. Again, I want to congratulate our graduates on their achievements, and I wish them the very best in all of their future endeavors.

Mr. Kessler has shared the following statement with my office today: "I'd like to take this opportunity to comment on the undergraduate commencement address that I gave on Saturday, May 20.

"I first would like to apologize to all offended by my words. As I stated in the opening line of my address, graduation is a time to look back and a time to look ahead.

"On Saturday, I looked back at some issues our university and our society have faced. I then looked ahead and tried to provide hope to all in attendance. Instead of providing hope to all, I offended some by my words and by my decision to speak those words at commencement. I sincerely apologize to each person I offended."

I watched the speech and fail to see it being an incredibly big deal. With all due respect to Kessler, to call it a "rant" as some have done is to ignore the tone, which was measured to the point of stilted.  I see that what inspired him initially was a food fight, and he alluded to it later in the speech in a rather well-done metaphor. I don't fault Kessler for taking his speech in this direction - but even starting from the same point, one could have written something that challenged the students to (basically) grow up, look outward and live for others without providing a massive distraction.  But, in the end, the spectre of the heckling at the suggestion that pre-marital sex is selfish (which was his real point), the formulaic apologies, and so on, are tiresome - free speech, anyone?

Comments

[Donald R. McClarey]

Time and place for everything. Commencement speeches are supposed to be empty, inoffensive bloviation. Jeremiads are usually reserved for the pulpit, the street corner, newspaper editorials and blogs.

[Ellyn]

I dunno. Sounds kind of refreshing to me. I don't think he said anything that people didn't know already. And I'd rather hear that type of address than watch someone destroy a rotator cuff patting himself on the back on behalf of the whole class.

[Ellyn]

I forgot to mention the stunning address at my sister's law school graduation - liberally sprinkled with quotes from Grateful Dead songs and ending with "what a long, strange trip it's been." In front of a Supreme Court justice. And a lot of confused parents. Eeeew.

[Jennifer]

"Internally strong and externally strong" may be OK, but not externally offensive. It was not the time for that speech. Something a little more positive would have been more appopriate.

[midwestmom]

""If someone were to start talking about their beliefs on gay rights, I guarantee you someone from the administration would have put an end to it right away," Aus said."

No, they wouldn't have! Kessler's remarks were not so caustic that he deserved to be physically stopped from proceeding. That sentiment in itself is outrageous and narrow-minded.

At a small Catholic U. in my diocese, during a homecoming senior roast, members of the women's soccer team gave a power-point presentation which included pictures of drunk girls 'humping' orange safety cones, passed out in bed, french kissing each other, clothes soaked with urine, etc. A few nuns got up and walked out but no faculty member made any attempt to get up and stop it. If that scene doesn't qualify, what does?

[nicole]

On American Papist, the description of the speech sounds different to me:

In the speech he lays out two choices for his audience: selfishness or selflessness, and wants them to be truly happy by giving and living selflessly. What he identifies as selfish are things like a cafeteria brawl that brought the police, the practice of birth control (because it hurts relationships in the long term, etc), and traveling and staying with an unmarried partner (in the case of St. Thomas, originally the problem was provoked by a lesbian couple). This is what Kessler spoke against. Those who protested his speech said he was "too conservative."

Kessler spoke about "true, lasting happiness ... as lived by St. Thomas Aquinas, Mother Theresa... and - dare he say it- Jesus Christ himself."

... so, what exactly does he have to apologize for again?

Based on reading that, I would say this may not as been as out of line as appears in the description above. I also agree that turning your back to speakers, booing, hissing, etc. along with speeches with a more 'liberal' agenda have been happening all around w/no outcry.

Perhaps it wasn't appropriate, but I encourage everyone who is interested to go to the American Papist site and watch the speech (he has a link).

Nicole

[Rich Leonardi]

From what I recall of my days at a small midwestern Catholic college, graduation day for most seniors capped-off a weekend of binge-drinking, last-minute fornication, and empty pledges to keep in touch. I wasn't an especially devout Catholic in those days. But I can understand how someone who is would look out on a sea of hungover fellow graduates with dollar signs and "Got A Job!" messages etched on their mortarboards and said, "To hell with this exercise in self-congratulation. I'm going to tell it like it is."

[Ray from MN]

I couldn't have told anyone what the commencement speaker at my graduation said two days later. Totally without inspiration or a message worth keeping.

The next day at Mass with my parents, though, came a homily (I believe they were still "sermons" back then) from a visiting priest who probably didn't even know that there was a university nearby, let alone that it was graduation weekend.

The theme of his sermon was something along the line of "you're not always going to get your first choice in life." The reason that it is so memorable is that the punch line of his talk was his question to the packed congregation: "You husbands and wives out there. How many of you married your first choice?"

There was a long silence and then loud (uncomfortable or nervous) laughter.

[ricopadre]

If only our bishops had the same guts as this student- good for him and good for the community of St. Thomas. The truth will set you free! People with fortitude like this young man are what our culture of death so depesperately needs. I luv it- telling people using birth control is selfish- if only all the priests of the US would do the same- it could be the start of the renewal of family life our last two popes have been harping on so much! Some of his hung-over confreres were probably ready choke on their beers!

[Marc]

This young man is intending to study for the priesthood. So, hopefully, he learned a good lesson on proper times and places to say things, but didn't get so burnt that he will be yet another priest who is afraid to "offend" anyone.

I am willing to bet that all of us on this board were equally impetuous when we were 21 years old. How many can say we were equally level headed about Church teachings?

[chris K]

Next year they can just substitute C. Arinze...he makes them walk out too!

[reluctant penitent]

'Time and place for everything.'

Unfortunately, there is never a time and place for public statements like this at UST. The university is always willing to approve events that please faculty and students hostile to Church teaching. There was, for example, a very loud and militant anti-travel policy demonstration in the quad, at which all individuals and groups opposed to gay marriage were anathemized as advocates of hate and violence against gays. A demonstration in support of the travel policy would never be approved at UST. Even public discussions of controversial issues seem never to get clearance organized by students and faculty suspected of affirming Church teaching. They generally take place only in UST's Catholic ghetto, also known as the Catholic Studies Center--founded, incidentally, by members of the theology department who wanted to engage in the scandalous act of teaching Catholic theology at a Catholic University. Mr. Kessler's speech will be a shot of courage to the browbeaten faculty and students at UST who support the travel policy and affirm Church teaching. Their numbers are growing and they are tired of being intimidated.

[Fr. Totton]

Amy,

you said you "watched" the speech. Is the video online somewhere? How about a full text?

[midwestmom]

Go to Bettnet.com for the link to the video of the speech.

[Craig Martin]

"Time and place for everything."

Really? Mario Cuomo and ND? He's been sainted by many for his address.

[Marc]

One more comment about "A time and a place for everything":

From Papa Ratzi
"A Christian knows when it is time to speak of God and when it is better to say nothing and to let love alone speak."
Deus Caritas Est 31

[Mike Petrik]

Based on the video this was no rant. I think the topics raised were within reason and perhaps even important to raise. I do think that he was trying to raise difficult issues in a diplomatic way, but could have used the assistance of someone with a better ear for these types of efforts. There are ways of making important moral points that are more uniting than dividing, but this requires considerable skill -- and this young man's speech didn't quite do the job. All that said, I admire him greatly for his courage. I suspect he will be an exceptional priest.

[Frank Gibbons]

Good job, Mr. Kessler.

[AJP]

Initially I was impressed with this young man's bravery, but the more I think about it and read the other comments, I'm leaning more towards the "time and a place for everything." What he said needed to be heard, but it could've been done more tactfully.

Nevertheless there is no excuse for heckling him and cussing at him from the audience. Even if one vehemently disagreed with everything he said, one should realize that acting like a guest at the Jerry Springer show only proves the young man's point.

I am bothered though that he only singled out women who use contraception. What about selfish men? Do they not share any blame in this matter? If he wishes to become a priest someday he will have to deal with this issue in a pastoral situation. He isn't going to be able to do that if he sees contraception as solely the fault of "selfish women."

[Mike]

You know what? Great.

At my graduation from the University of Maryland a few years ago, we were subjected to a 45-minute Anti-Republican screed from then-Governor Paris Glendening. Nary a boo or hiss was heard from the student body.

Just a week or so ago, we heard about the student in NYC speaking strongly against John McCain right before he delivered his address, and he was loudly heckled.

Anytime a conservative sets foot on campus, he or she is risking a pie in the face or a bucket of water over the head. A republican, no matter how benign the topic, can't seem to get through a speech without a gang of protestors busting in interrupt the speech.

I'm sick of it. Last time I read the catechism, I don't remember seeing a chapter on etiquitte. I don't think there's anything that says we have to be silent and polite while the liberals bulldoze right over everything that we hold sacred.

Most of my life, I kept my mouth shut. All through high school and college, I let liberals voice their opinions while holding mine back for fear that I would offend, or that I would be unpopular or endure ridicule.

No more. With all due respect to Marc, there are some issues that I will not let liberals spout off their opinions unopposed. Terri Schiavo was the start. I couldn't hold it back any longer. Abortion, DVC, the Pope, Embryonic stem cells - I imagine many of us have let liberal friends and relatives rant unopposed about these topics numerous times. They are the ones who have changed the rules of etiquitte, and we haven't pushed back hard enough. I'm not saying to become raving lunatics and "Jesus freaks," because they're the only ones that ARE speaking for our side.

We need to be witnesses to Christ. Mr. Kessler is a credit to his college and his Church. The only thing spectacular about his witness is because it's rare to see. This is why we need to level the playing field.

[reluctant penitent]

He did not single out women. Here is my transcription from the video of the part about birthcontrol: 'Is using the birth control pill good for the female, the male or the long-term health of their relationship? No...It's selfish.' You can check it for yourself if you like.

The journalist must believe that males never want the females with whom they are having sex to take the pill. This assumption is questionable. I have yet to meet a couple where the woman is taking the pill and the man is urging her to stop because he wants babies.

[Theo]

I'd hazard a guess that regardless of when or how he raised those issues on campus, he'd get the same treatment.

I think his candor is refreshing, and welcome in a world where we've been trained to walk around on tiptoe for fear that we might offend someone. Not to mention Christ-like - the courageous, Temple-cleansing, Pharisee-bashing Jesus so unpopular in today's comfortable world.

That he wants to become a priest makes it even better. How many priests in today's world are really willing to stand up and tell the truth, regardless of the cost?

I just hope they haven't intimidated him into permanent silence or shallow politeness. We need priests like him.

[Fr Martin Fox]

Even if one can make an argument for this not being the time and place (which I'm not agreeing with, but acknowledging as legit), I think the administration's reaction was sad; I think the president of the university could have said something like:

"One might wish that Mr. Kessler had been less provocative in his remarks; certainly chastity and being open to the gift of life--as opposed to contraception--are Catholic values that our society doesn't grasp, and grappling with them in a commencement speech is daring move. Mr. Kessler surely knew this would be provocative.

"That said: being provocative, challenging accepted notions, and comfortable assumptions, is precisely what a university--any university, and certainly a Catholic one--exists to do. If men and women graduating from a university are not prepared for challenges, for ideas with which they disagree, one must question why they are graduating--their work is incomplete.

"To stand up for selflessness instead of selfishness; and boldly to name real situations, real examples, even if uncomfortable ones; this far better models what Catholic education is about, than does heckling unwelcome speech, cursing, mocking, attempting to shut it down, or fleeing it.

"There is a lesson for us all in this episode; sadly, many who are calling for Mr. Kessler's head have missed it."

Something like that. Or maybe, Al Pacino's speech at the end of "Scent of a Woman."

[John]

Considering Ben has yet to begin major seminary, this might be putting the cart before the horse, but I foresee that we'll one day see him wearing a ring and mitre.

[Rich Leonardi]

Something like that. Or maybe, Al Pacino's speech at the end of "Scent of a Woman."

Although I never saw the movie, every time ten years ago when someone would say, "Boo Ahhh," a la Pacino I would reach for an imaginary revolver.

[Marie]

As a woman, I think Mr. Kessler's courage and fortitude is refreshing. A graduation speech should be a re-cap of the school year. To ignore the problems St. Thomas had this year would be like ignoring the elephant in the room.

As the mother of 5 sons, I say, "Athletic, smart, brave: There's your role model, boys."

As the mother of 1 girl, I say, "Mr. Kessler, if you don't feel God is calling you to the priesthood, may I introduce you to my daughter?"